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  • Writer's pictureSara Broadhurst

Holy sh*t, I have to stay at home with my husband for the next month!

First things first, I really love my husband - there's no one in this world I admire more and I genuinely feel lucky that he chooses me every day (is this sounding like an apology for writing this post?).

However, the thought of being in the same space with him EVERY SINGLE DAY for the next month makes me feel anxious.

Maybe you feel this too? Never fear, I've done the research for you. Here are some brilliant ideas for getting through the next month, relationship even stronger - or at least, intact.

Work separately - if you have the space in your house, try and do your work separately. We are, all of us, quite different people at work to the people we are at home and some things should remain a mystery in your relationship. More than that though, it means you can actually focus on your work and remain the high-performing superstar you are, instead of getting dragged into their concerns about "Kim, who just sent this crazy email..."

Connect with others - most workplaces will have organised team meetings by video by now. If your place hasn't, don't wait for someone else to do it, get on it. Organise your team into a daily ten-minute heartbeat video conference or call now. One place I worked in did this every day, in normal times and in tough times, and it makes for an organisation which stays connected together, one that looks after its people and drives to high performance. In these times, I think you probably need to organise the Friday drinks by video conference too. Don't forget to connect with others too. Five minutes a day facetiming with your friend on the Gold Coast, will do wonders, for you, and for them.

Exercise separately - the reality is that, even working from home, you are likely to have more time on your hands. While the gyms might be closed, it's still ok to walk or run outside. Try doing that separately so that you get your own space but also actually have something new to tell each other about.

Structure communication - don't roll your eyes at me, I know this sounds twee. But, if while everything is good you agree to try some structured communication, on the day it feels tough (and there will be tough days), you won't be trying to negotiate in a hail of bullets. So, how could we do that? Maybe every day, asking each other two questions, really listening (rather than waiting for your turn to speak) and taking action:

1) How are you feeling?

2) What's one thing I could do to make this easier for you?

Finally, pause - if you're feeling ten days in that maybe this is a sign of deeper relationship problems, pause, take a breath and keep perspective. There are media reports that divorce rates in China have risen due to the pressures of being together too much. These are crazy times for all of us, we will come through it to the next destination in our lives, so stay positive and remain adaptable.

PS - I'm not a marriage counsellor by any stretch of the imagination, but I do coach a lot on interpersonal relationships at work so I've just tried to apply those in a domestic context. If you have better ideas, please do comment. He waka eke noa.

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